bread fail and other adventures

I have a small obsession with food. I love to talk and read about it, grow it, bake it, cook it, eat it, and feed it to others. Though cooking has come pretty naturally, I am relatively new to baking. In fact, Clark is the baker in this family because I just can't resist experimenting - an endeavor that, when baking, usually ends in disaster. This is the latest:

(The red fan at the top is blowing away the putrid smoke
pouring from the bread machine.)

We didn't have any milk, so I thought, "Why not try almond milk? Who cares if it's chocolate?" Then we didn't have any eggs, and I was already in it too deep by then. I tried an egg replacement technique (corn starch + water) but got the ratios wrong - - obviously. Also, I used honey instead of brown sugar. Maybe three substitutions was two too many.

The bread machine is usually pretty safe for me. Anyway. It's not all failure. I made some amazing pita bread for falafel on my first try. Also, Mom G has taught us how to make artisan bread and it works out well most of the time . . . unless you try to substitute whole wheat - then it burns on the outside before it finishes cooking on the inside and the loaf ends up weighing about ten pounds.

(Yeah, I take pictures of my food. So?)

This post inspired by Cake Wrecks, which I found on Sara's blog, and Craft Fail. Check them out.